Rage
https://www.amazon.com/Rage-Collection-Essays-Lily-Bell/dp/B084T37NS5
The End
I’ve been had. The joke’s on me. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Hope it was worth it. Move along, there will be nothing more to see here.
Just Say No
There’s a critical life lesson that my parents neglected to teach me which is how to say no. It’s important to learn to say no because it’s empowering and it allows you to establish healthy boundaries. But my parents raised a family of overly-accommodating people pleasers who have a hard time refusing anyone anything. Being …
Life is Short
Yesterday, I was caught off guard by a medical diagnosis. It’s the second time in my life that my day started unassumingly but ended in a startling way. I felt panicked and unprepared. I started ranting about end-of-life plans. My husband patiently listened and then coaxed me back to reality. Unless I get hit by …
Let Me Go
I have to wonder why every single day at least one of you reads my blog. You were the ones who rejected me, remember? Why do you care what I have to say now? You didn’t care when I desperately needed you to, but it’s obvious you care now, at least about my writing. It …
A Clean Slate
I’ve made a very important reconnection. It means the world to me. I want to do it right. I want to be genuine. I want it to be as perfect as I fantasize that it will be. I don’t want to come on too strong. I want everything to be like it was. I want …
Gaslighting and Flying Monkeys 101
It’s the night before the historic impeachment vote and Donald Trump has taken manipulation to a whole new level by sending a six-page rant-filled letter to Speaker Pelosi. The letter serves as documentation of belittling, bullying, accusing, blaming, shaming, demanding, ordering, threatening, criticizing, raging, and name-calling directed at Speaker Pelosi and the Democratic Party. It’s …
A Sign of Hope
There is nothing I have ever felt worse than despair. It is a feeling so hopeless that your heart literally aches inside your chest. You can feel your ribcage cracking under the weight of it and you think you’re going to choke to death on your own tongue as the pain crawls up your throat. …
The Contract
They sent my abuser a “Basic Terms of Residence” contract a few weeks after he tried to kill me. He was recovering from severe burns after he’d caught himself on fire burning my house to the ground. He’d destroyed our home and, like me, was left without a permanent residence. So they offered up their …
The Phone Call
My phone announced her call. I stood there for a second staring down at it. I saw her name and her photo smiling up at me from the coffee table and I didn’t know what to do. My first thought was that she accidentally butt-dialed me and I contemplated letting it go to voicemail just …